"Turn Up the Heat in Your Marriage by Trying These Tips"

 by Susie and Otto Collins

If you’re like a lot of people in long-standing marriage, you may be longing for the days when your love for each other was obvious to everyone.

You may have looked at one another for hours, laughed together at small things, kissed until the wee hours of the night. But now your life together is filled with so many other things that pull you apart instead of draw you closer together.

You may be wondering where the passion has gone and how do you get it back.

The good news is that you can rekindle passion that has died. It just takes a bit of refocusing, looking at your partner in a new way and it starts before you even get to the bedroom.

Here are 4 ways to begin bringing more romance back into your relationship and they may not be what you think...

1. Be generous with sincere compliments and appreciation. Sincere compliments and appreciation can uplift you and your partner—and can draw you closer. So often a compliment or a word of thanks is followed up by a complaint. If this is your habit, stop doing it.

2. Never go to bed angry.  Of all the couples we've talked with and interviewed who have been married 30, 40, and 50 years, this is the most consistent advice they have given us. Take some time when a conflict comes up between the two of you to talk it out. Listen to each other with love and not judgment.

 3. Even if you are busy or tired, open your heart to your partner. Opening your heart means taking the time to listen and understand your partner. It means telling your partner what’s important to you and not making assumptions. It means not using the "I'm tired" or "Not tonight, I have a headache" excuse to stop love-making. Be honest about why you aren't in the mood and take a few moments to connect in other ways.

 4.  Continue to explore each other.  There's always something new you can learn about your loved one, even if you have been together for many years.  Don't assume that you know everything about them.

These are just a few ideas to rekindle the trust and passion between the two of you and to keep your relationship alive, passionate and filled with love.

Always remember that love is a choice that we open up to in every moment. You always have the choice of where you place your attention. We hope that you'll join us in choosing love more of the time.

Relationship coaches Susie and Otto Collins, authors of "Red Hot Love Relationships," invite you to visit http://www.redhotloverelationships.com
to learn how you can bring more passion into your relationship.